Thanksgiving...the official kick off to the “holiday” season, usually celebrated with a gathering of family, friends, a big feast, and the very sad demise of millions of turkeys. I became a vegetarian when I was 15 years old so I can’t really say that it’s ever been my favorite holiday. I mostly just looked forward to a bunch of mediocre side dishes and tried to enjoy the company that I was with. Can anyone else relate to stopping at a diner or the local bar on the way home from Thanksgiving dinner because you’re still so hungry? This was me many times over.
Flash forward to the past 3 years and I’m happy to report that this hasn’t been the case for me. Why? I finally decided to take the reins on Thanksgiving and have a feast that I could enjoy instead of one that was just dry mashed potatoes, dry vegan stuffing, bland green beans, and canned cranberry sauce (which,ok, is honestly one of my faves). Is it any wonder that I felt like I was starving after a meal like this? Here are my tips on how to have a successful, delicious, and satisfying plant-based Thanksgiving and to hopefully turn this into a holiday that you look forward to rather than dread. Now if I only I could do something about those uncomfortable political conversations that potentially come up…
Start Your Own Traditions
I’ve always been pretty vocal about how much I dislike the food at Thanksgiving. My close friends and family know that I don’t enjoy sitting at a table where the star of the meal is a dead bird. So, a couple of years ago my husband and I decided that we were going to have our own Thanksgiving with our new son who was 8 months old at the time. We stayed in NYC, instead of going to one of our parents’ houses in NJ, avoided the insane Thanksgiving traffic, and attempted to start our own tradition. Since it was just going to be the 3 of us, and our son was only slightly eating solids, we went out for dinner to a vegan restaurant, Delice & Sarrisin. Yup, we had vegan French food for Thanksgiving and at that time, it was the best meal I’d ever had on that holiday. There was nothing “Thanksgiving-like” about it, and I was 100% ok with that. I’ll never forget that chilly but perfect day...we walked from our home in Brooklyn, over the Williamsburg bridge, into the Lower East Side of the city and then all the way to the West Village. We felt so lucky to be together and to be able to get such delicious vegan food in the city that we were growing our new family in. Although it was such a wonderful Thanksgiving for us, we did have to be aware that we might hurt other people’s feelings...so how do you handle that part?
Step 1: invite your family to join you (even if you know they are going to say no - they might surprise you)! We did this however, as we had assumed, our families couldn't join us because they had their own obligations. We would have been happy for them to have come had they been able to!
Step 2: Stick to your guns. I’ll admit, I don’t think that our families were very happy about our decision to ditch them on the holiday, especially because it was our son’s first Thanksgiving. However sometimes, you have to do you...and that’s ok! Sure, you might make someone upset but remember that it’s just one day and it’s a holiday that doesn’t resonate with you. People get over it and more importantly, it’s ok to put yourself first sometimes.
Step 3: Remind everyone that there’s a lot more holiday to celebrate. The other major holidays are about a month after Thanksgiving and you can promise that you’ll see your family then, when it really matters. This is what we did and I truly believe that it softened the blow that we skipped “Turkey Day”. Maybe make a deal that you’ll come to Thanksgiving every other year, or that you’ll come for an extra visit after the New Year, whatever makes them happy! Because, really, the holidays are about making friends and family happy, right? (But, also yourself - See Step 2!)
Step 4: Find your back-up reasons, if it’s going to come down to that. Our families are only about a 1.5-2.5 hour drive from us and we were able to have our own Thanksgiving by being open about how we felt, what we wanted to do, and how not fun it would be for our new baby to sit in traffic for over 3 hours (that’s about how long it had taken us to get to Thanksgiving the year before that- normally it’s less than 1.5 hours to where we went). If you live far from where you normally go on Thanksgiving, I think that gives you even more clout to say that you just can’t make it this year because it’s expensive, time consuming, you have to be at work the next day (that was actually true for me that year as well - it sucked - if this is you, my heart goes out!), your dog ate your homework, etc. Go back to step #2 too.
Major Caveat: If there are other circumstances here, such as that it’s looking like this is going to be your Grandparent’s last Thanksgiving, then you might want to proceed down on how to handle the meal when you’re still going to see your family. You can always start your new tradition another time!
Go Out!
Who says that Thanksgiving HAS to be a home-cooked meal? There is no rule about this! We went out (see above) one year and it was fantastic. You may be surprised to know that a lot of restaurants are open on Thanksgiving and some even do special menus for the holiday. Once my husband and I decided that we were going to go out, we started looking into vegan restaurants in Manhattan that would be open. All you have to do is search, check Instagram accounts, call, email, etc and you’ll find a few wherever you are. Sometimes certain types of restaurants stay open on Thanksgiving too because they don’t celebrate the holiday such as those that serve Chinese, Indian, or Thai food. So, will you be having a traditional Thanksgiving dinner - probably not. But, do you even want to? And if you do, that’s ok too! Try to find a place that will serve that purpose for you!
Once you find the spot you’d like to go to, I highly recommend making a reservation. When we went out, the entire restaurant was packed, which we weren’t expecting. Luckily, we had a reservation and had asked for a high chair in advance as well.
If you’re local to NYC, or just want to visit on Thanksgiving (which I highly recommend!) here is a list of plant-based restaurants that will be open:
Delice & Sarrasin (this is where we went)
You’re Still Going to Your Non-Veg Friendly Family...Womp Womp
Ok, so, you’re doing what you always do, going where you always go on Thanksgiving, and maybe dreading the food that you won’t be able to eat. After that first year of being Thanksgiving rebels, we went back to spending the holidays with our family (we can’t keep the grandson to ourselves forever). But, again, we took matters into our own hands, spoke up, brought a main dish with us and actually had a delicious and satisfying meal! You can too! You can bring anything you want, as long as you ask first...unless your host says no, then I don’t know what to tell you...I’m sorry? Here are my tips for handling being plant-based at Thanksgiving with your family.
Speak Up in Advance to your Hosts. No one knows your dietary restrictions unless you tell them. Remember that some people don’t know what the difference is between vegetarian and vegan or really what they mean at all. Explain what you can and cannot eat. People, especially good hosts, generally want to be accomodating.
Offer to bring something edible for a main dish and dessert. Who cares if you’re the only one at the table who will eat it? And, you may be surprised at who wants to try it. My husband’s grandmother was chowing down on seitan turkey last year (which I highly recommend from Seitan’s Helper if you’re a New Yorker!). Side note - our son was in love with the “turkey” too. I listed this and some other ideas on what to bring below.
Educate. Your family might be curious why you’re plant-based, what you eat, how you get your protein (groan!), etc. Just answer the best that you can and try not to be defensive or annoyed that they don’t understand. Remember that everyone’s diet choices are very personal. Try to avoid any arguments or make it political.
Don’t Feel Obligated. I know this one might be hard for some but it really isn’t “impolite” to refuse food, unless you make it out to be that way. What if you had a severe food allergy to peanuts? You wouldn’t eat peanuts just because they were served to you and risk getting rushed off to the hospital. Your diet choices are yours. Don’t eat turkey because you feel like it will offend your family/friends if you don’t. And if it does, that’s their problem, not yours.
Have a back up plan. If you’ve given up on anyone understanding how you eat, letting you bring something, or just don’t want to deal with talking about it - I get it all. So, do your duty by showing up, making friendly conversation, trying to eat whatever you possibly can, and then have a plan of where you’re going to go once you can get the heck out of there. See above for “Go out!” so that you can start researching. Or, better yet, make some of the recipes below and have them ready to go for when you get home.
Finally, The Food Part
No matter what your diet is, Thanksgiving is always going to be about the food. If you’re hosting your own Thanksgiving or bringing a dish or two to wherever you’re going, here are some resources/advice on where to look:
Store Bought
Time is running out, but if you can order a Seitan’s Helper Thanksgiving Turkey (or anything from their Thanksgiving menu) make sure to email them ASAP. (Local to NYC)
Riverdel has a Thanksgiving menu that you can pick up to go. (Local to NYC)
There’s always the good old fashioned Tofurkey Roast and you can find these in most major grocery stores.
Field Roast has their versions of a turkey roast as well.
Dr. Cow has amazing vegan cheese and they even have a cheese board that you can order online. This would be a great host gift that you can actually enjoy too!
Homemade
Every single recipe that I have ever made from the New York Times Cooking section has been spectacular. Lucky for us, they rounded up all of their best vegan recipes just for Thanksgiving here.
Purple Carrot, a plant-based meal delivery service, has a few 100% vegan Thanksgiving recipes to try.
Fellow plant-based dietitian, Wholesome, did a round up of all of their vegan Thanksgiving recipes here and they look delicious.
Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
No matter what you do, who you’re with, or what you’re eating that day, I hope that you have a wonderful plant-based Thanksgiving. Remember that this holiday is a time for us to reflect and be grateful for all that we have, all of the people in our lives that we love and who love us back, and to start mentally making our holiday wish lists (my guide will be coming forth soon!). In all seriousness, have a Happy (Plant-Based) Thanksgiving!
